*** The post is about how I got over the pain of a rejection and started afresh. I would like to thank Housing.com for having given me the opportunity to write about it. More can be found about them here ***
Most of us would have faced rejection in life at some point in time. It's not easy coping with the pain. Especially if someone gets rejected in love. There is nothing quite like the heartache of an unrequited love. When someone gives her heart and soul to a person whom she loves and then gets rejected, gets to know that her feelings aren't reciprocated, it completely breaks her down. She feels shattered. It's very hard to recover from that pain. You don't get over it just like that, it's not easy to wipe off those memories, it takes some time but that too doesn't come easy or quickly. Every minute seems like a year, the pain is intense, the memories would be stinging your heart, so it feels unbearable.
I was only 19 when I fell deeply in love with one of my classmates. We had become good friends since the start of our college, right from the day of our orientation program. We were in the same batch and the same course. He was a very quiet and a simple-natured person, I would often find him at the library and he came across as a studious boy, so I had kind of started to like him. But I had no idea that he too had nurtured same feelings for me too. So I was completely bowled over when one day he came to me and proposed. I had never fallen in love before, I was very young too, so it was a strange feeling but I loved it. Before I knew, I was completely and madly in love with him. I had already started to dream about my future with him. Our relationship continued even after we completed our graduation and started working, though we weren't able to meet as often as we used to do earlier. Both of us were quite serious about our careers too. Still we would meet whenever we could and spent time together. I was quite clear about getting married to him and even discussed about it with my parents too. He too told me that he had spoken to his parents. Our parents met with each other and a date was fixed for the marriage. But before that, we both got engaged to each other. So we were all set to culminate our relationship in marriage. I had already dreamt too far ahead, about experiencing the various challenges of life with him.
But my world came crashing down when suddenly one day he called me to inform that he was calling off the marriage, that he no more felt the same way for me as he previously used to do, that he had fallen in love with a girl in his office. That came as such a sharp blow that I couldn't even react. I was heart-broken. After being in love for six years, he was suddenly telling me that he didn't love me anymore and had moved on to another girl while I was still stuck with him because I loved him madly. I felt so cheated, I had never imagined that he would break my heart this way. I felt very dejected and depressed.
Eventually he got married to that girl a few months later while I had gone into a depression. I had left my job, I had stopped picking up calls from my friends, I just couldn't think about anything else. I had not only locked myself up in my room but had also in a way cut myself off from the outer world. I had lost my sleep completely and had even started taking sleeping pills but they too didn't come of much use after a period. My parents took me to various doctors who could only give me anti-depressant tablets but my condition remained still the same. I was just not able to pick myself up and start afresh. I was finding it very difficult to fill the emptiness in my heart, it was too much for me.
Then one day I suddenly woke up from my pills-induced sleep and found both maa and baba sitting beside me. They were both crying. That was when I realised how I had been giving them pain, that for one relationship, I had been neglecting them. I had built up walls around me. I wasn't seeing how much my family loved me and how bad they were feeling themselves on seeing in that miserable condition. I realised that life can't stop just because of one rejection. It should go on. While my ex-boyfriend had moved on with his life, I was still stuck with the failed relationship, thinking about it all the time. It struck me really hard.
It wasn't so simple to shake off the disappointment, the pain or the anger just like that but I had to start from somewhere and that's what I did. Instead of taking those anti-depressant tablets, I started to keep myself busy as as not to let negative thoughts come to my mind again. I started helping my father in his music shop. I even joined as a volunteer at an old-age home. Thus I remained busy most of the time. I let time to heal up the pain, but more than that, I had got back my desire to start life afresh. No pain is big enough to keep you down if you remain positive and are ready to start over again. It took me some time but finally I got over my heartache. Now when I look back at the time, I feel happy that it happened, because it not only made me a mature person but also it gave me a chance to cope with the pain of rejection. Now I feel fully prepared and ready to deal with any rejection that comes my way in the future.
Most of us would have faced rejection in life at some point in time. It's not easy coping with the pain. Especially if someone gets rejected in love. There is nothing quite like the heartache of an unrequited love. When someone gives her heart and soul to a person whom she loves and then gets rejected, gets to know that her feelings aren't reciprocated, it completely breaks her down. She feels shattered. It's very hard to recover from that pain. You don't get over it just like that, it's not easy to wipe off those memories, it takes some time but that too doesn't come easy or quickly. Every minute seems like a year, the pain is intense, the memories would be stinging your heart, so it feels unbearable.
I was only 19 when I fell deeply in love with one of my classmates. We had become good friends since the start of our college, right from the day of our orientation program. We were in the same batch and the same course. He was a very quiet and a simple-natured person, I would often find him at the library and he came across as a studious boy, so I had kind of started to like him. But I had no idea that he too had nurtured same feelings for me too. So I was completely bowled over when one day he came to me and proposed. I had never fallen in love before, I was very young too, so it was a strange feeling but I loved it. Before I knew, I was completely and madly in love with him. I had already started to dream about my future with him. Our relationship continued even after we completed our graduation and started working, though we weren't able to meet as often as we used to do earlier. Both of us were quite serious about our careers too. Still we would meet whenever we could and spent time together. I was quite clear about getting married to him and even discussed about it with my parents too. He too told me that he had spoken to his parents. Our parents met with each other and a date was fixed for the marriage. But before that, we both got engaged to each other. So we were all set to culminate our relationship in marriage. I had already dreamt too far ahead, about experiencing the various challenges of life with him.
But my world came crashing down when suddenly one day he called me to inform that he was calling off the marriage, that he no more felt the same way for me as he previously used to do, that he had fallen in love with a girl in his office. That came as such a sharp blow that I couldn't even react. I was heart-broken. After being in love for six years, he was suddenly telling me that he didn't love me anymore and had moved on to another girl while I was still stuck with him because I loved him madly. I felt so cheated, I had never imagined that he would break my heart this way. I felt very dejected and depressed.
Eventually he got married to that girl a few months later while I had gone into a depression. I had left my job, I had stopped picking up calls from my friends, I just couldn't think about anything else. I had not only locked myself up in my room but had also in a way cut myself off from the outer world. I had lost my sleep completely and had even started taking sleeping pills but they too didn't come of much use after a period. My parents took me to various doctors who could only give me anti-depressant tablets but my condition remained still the same. I was just not able to pick myself up and start afresh. I was finding it very difficult to fill the emptiness in my heart, it was too much for me.
Then one day I suddenly woke up from my pills-induced sleep and found both maa and baba sitting beside me. They were both crying. That was when I realised how I had been giving them pain, that for one relationship, I had been neglecting them. I had built up walls around me. I wasn't seeing how much my family loved me and how bad they were feeling themselves on seeing in that miserable condition. I realised that life can't stop just because of one rejection. It should go on. While my ex-boyfriend had moved on with his life, I was still stuck with the failed relationship, thinking about it all the time. It struck me really hard.
It wasn't so simple to shake off the disappointment, the pain or the anger just like that but I had to start from somewhere and that's what I did. Instead of taking those anti-depressant tablets, I started to keep myself busy as as not to let negative thoughts come to my mind again. I started helping my father in his music shop. I even joined as a volunteer at an old-age home. Thus I remained busy most of the time. I let time to heal up the pain, but more than that, I had got back my desire to start life afresh. No pain is big enough to keep you down if you remain positive and are ready to start over again. It took me some time but finally I got over my heartache. Now when I look back at the time, I feel happy that it happened, because it not only made me a mature person but also it gave me a chance to cope with the pain of rejection. Now I feel fully prepared and ready to deal with any rejection that comes my way in the future.
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